This question creeps me...especially at night...when you are alone in the dark; the answer to which I need to find out very soon... need to figure things out...
How alone are you?Being divorced/single does it count?What about parents? family near and far? Are they counted as well? Can't really say...I think the problem is being the only child...or is it? Most people I know do not even have any connection with their siblings later on when their parents die to hold onto each other...what's the point? As though we don't have enough stress to deal with....here comes "Sibling related Stress"...What would people do (the single child in the family who is alone) when their parents die???
I mean look at my Chhotka...he's already 39 and has lost his father. With dida going insane at this age...he's practically alone...I mean does he have his family to count on? Like me, Papa, Ma and others...Are we even in the picture,literally? Its just a phone call now that connects us....but that too is a detached one......we have most ridiculous conversations...still...we have each other to talk to at least....or I think so.Is this why people try get others married...just for companionship? to have somebody to call your own? a family? Is that the only fucking reason to be married? I heard somebody telling "Marriage is like an insurance policy...you pay the premium at young age...you reap the benefits when you are old"...Is that what he was talking about..benefit of not being lonely...
My father is also a classic example , but of a different kind...he lost his mother hen he was six...and did everything all alone...my Dadu wasn't really a good father I think...being distraught and all....with 3 boys (of which one was mentally challenged). Poor guy! He didn't have a clue as to what to do...he left his boys on their own..pretty much at the mercy of his mother and his mother-in-law....So when he died...Papa was left with only one person he could call his own....his youngest brother (the middle one had died by then...i have never really known about him...nobody even mentions about him to me)....of course he had his uncles/aunts/cousins...Then they got him married...so Maa came into the picture...Kaku was still family then....And when he got married..everything changed....there was my Papa without any parents and brother....except he had 2 additional persons to call his own....his wife and me (his daughter)...he has successfully created a family of his own....
It was weird rather creepy...when Ravi got the call yesterday...we're just leaving from work..when our manager Satya called and aske dus to come to the nearest hospital rightaway..he had an accident...it was raining heavily and his kinetic honda skidded probably...We rushed to the scene...his ankle was badly injured and he is gone for 30 days....We called his family...his wife and 2 kids came soon...along with their mama....And like most; she was a dumbo as well...so information whatsoever about insurance/e card/cashless facility etc....whom to call what to do...we were there...so we got her covered for that night I guess...
It got me thinking...what if something happens to me...and I am hospitalized (one of my nightmares)...I don't even have anybody to call....I have to admit to a group of strange people in white coats...that I don't have anybody to call...may be office colleagues for an hour or two...I will just give them my insurance e card and call our vantage guy at the max....Is that what Maa means when she says...there should be somebody to take care of you? Again another very unsubstantial reason to get married I think...I mean...what if that somebody doesn't care or bother? I have seen that kind already...
And then when you least expect it....you come to know that your childhood buddy's father died...and they don't let you know being in the same city...yes, Bua is sorry for that probably...I have never seen him crying earlier..He told me today when I called him in the evening....He's never felt so alone in his life...his cousins came, his friends came,his uncles came...BUT..still...its only him and kakima from now on....He is as you have already guessed the only son who is single...Now his marriage is postponed to end of next year...probably...That was kaku's last wish/thought...to get his son married...
Another one is Babypishi...no wonder why people were hyped to get her married as soon as sona dadu & dida died back in 2009.She has a job and she is above 50 I think...She manages somehow all alone...
And just imagine all those spouses who are left behind in loneliness...because their lifelong partners have died...Has the life insurance concept paid them off? I wonder...
Also those who are alone as they are divorced/separated....bojjudidi, bukundada and the likes...
The point is you are always alone...from the moment you are born till the moment you die...family comes and goes...they are not for keeps though...You just need to not get used to someone or a group of persons...You stay alone and you feel alone....that's the way it is....No attachment no pain...Just be social and friendly....Keep the rest of yourself locked and away from everybody....At least that way you don't expect anything from them...Family is just a bullshit concept.No one is ever really there for you...Life just goes on until 20122012...
How alone are you?Being divorced/single does it count?What about parents? family near and far? Are they counted as well? Can't really say...I think the problem is being the only child...or is it? Most people I know do not even have any connection with their siblings later on when their parents die to hold onto each other...what's the point? As though we don't have enough stress to deal with....here comes "Sibling related Stress"...What would people do (the single child in the family who is alone) when their parents die???
I mean look at my Chhotka...he's already 39 and has lost his father. With dida going insane at this age...he's practically alone...I mean does he have his family to count on? Like me, Papa, Ma and others...Are we even in the picture,literally? Its just a phone call now that connects us....but that too is a detached one......we have most ridiculous conversations...still...we have each other to talk to at least....or I think so.Is this why people try get others married...just for companionship? to have somebody to call your own? a family? Is that the only fucking reason to be married? I heard somebody telling "Marriage is like an insurance policy...you pay the premium at young age...you reap the benefits when you are old"...Is that what he was talking about..benefit of not being lonely...
My father is also a classic example , but of a different kind...he lost his mother hen he was six...and did everything all alone...my Dadu wasn't really a good father I think...being distraught and all....with 3 boys (of which one was mentally challenged). Poor guy! He didn't have a clue as to what to do...he left his boys on their own..pretty much at the mercy of his mother and his mother-in-law....So when he died...Papa was left with only one person he could call his own....his youngest brother (the middle one had died by then...i have never really known about him...nobody even mentions about him to me)....of course he had his uncles/aunts/cousins...Then they got him married...so Maa came into the picture...Kaku was still family then....And when he got married..everything changed....there was my Papa without any parents and brother....except he had 2 additional persons to call his own....his wife and me (his daughter)...he has successfully created a family of his own....
It was weird rather creepy...when Ravi got the call yesterday...we're just leaving from work..when our manager Satya called and aske dus to come to the nearest hospital rightaway..he had an accident...it was raining heavily and his kinetic honda skidded probably...We rushed to the scene...his ankle was badly injured and he is gone for 30 days....We called his family...his wife and 2 kids came soon...along with their mama....And like most; she was a dumbo as well...so information whatsoever about insurance/e card/cashless facility etc....whom to call what to do...we were there...so we got her covered for that night I guess...
It got me thinking...what if something happens to me...and I am hospitalized (one of my nightmares)...I don't even have anybody to call....I have to admit to a group of strange people in white coats...that I don't have anybody to call...may be office colleagues for an hour or two...I will just give them my insurance e card and call our vantage guy at the max....Is that what Maa means when she says...there should be somebody to take care of you? Again another very unsubstantial reason to get married I think...I mean...what if that somebody doesn't care or bother? I have seen that kind already...
And then when you least expect it....you come to know that your childhood buddy's father died...and they don't let you know being in the same city...yes, Bua is sorry for that probably...I have never seen him crying earlier..He told me today when I called him in the evening....He's never felt so alone in his life...his cousins came, his friends came,his uncles came...BUT..still...its only him and kakima from now on....He is as you have already guessed the only son who is single...Now his marriage is postponed to end of next year...probably...That was kaku's last wish/thought...to get his son married...
Another one is Babypishi...no wonder why people were hyped to get her married as soon as sona dadu & dida died back in 2009.She has a job and she is above 50 I think...She manages somehow all alone...
And just imagine all those spouses who are left behind in loneliness...because their lifelong partners have died...Has the life insurance concept paid them off? I wonder...
Also those who are alone as they are divorced/separated....bojjudidi, bukundada and the likes...
The point is you are always alone...from the moment you are born till the moment you die...family comes and goes...they are not for keeps though...You just need to not get used to someone or a group of persons...You stay alone and you feel alone....that's the way it is....No attachment no pain...Just be social and friendly....Keep the rest of yourself locked and away from everybody....At least that way you don't expect anything from them...Family is just a bullshit concept.No one is ever really there for you...Life just goes on until 20122012...